Rosahelminthe: *lights fire*
Rosahelminthe! I’ve missed you, I haven’t seen you in a very long time! How’s my game treating you?
Rosahelminthe: You mean after you killed me just because you felt like it?
…I…I…you’d just given birth to quads I mean come on…
Rosahelminthe: Lookie here, I’d finally beat up the evil witch, I had five kids, I was HAPPY. Did it bother you so much you decided to kill me off?
Millie: I’m sure she didn’t mean it.
Millie! Yes that’s right I didn’t mean it.
Millie: Just like she didn’t mean to have Roland assassinated by naturals in a dark alley, right?
Rosahelminthe: Millie? My youngest daughter…you were treated badly as well?
Millie: I got imprisoned in a fairy house.
Balthier: Fairies aren’t so bad. But I guess I’m biased since my dad and my twin were one.
Balthier! Haven’t seen you since you died of old age!
Rosahelminthe: Oh so he had a normal death?
Millie: At least he had one. We were just talking about how badly we were treated son, what about you?
Oh Balthier had it nice, right?
Balthier: Well…The mother of my first children died giving birth. All my three children got kidnapped or disappeared at the same time. I got shot.
OK, just…I named dogs after you three!
Cain: You want to talk bad treatment? Let me tell you my story.
Oh…nevermind go away XD, you’ll just make things worst!
Balthier: Oh yes, I was there for most of it too!
Cain: First off, I get kidnapped by deranged fairy children-
Rosahelminthe: The fairies again, they’re bad I tell you.
Cain: Then an anti-supernatural group takes interest in me, but because I reject their offer they kill my grandpa.
Millie: So that was why Roland died…
Cain: Then they shot my dad, killed Clarice –
Millie: Clarice was still a white-eyed eh…
Cain: I got possessed by an evil witch because of a book-
Rosahelminthe: You shouldn’t have touched it in the first place!
Cain: I killed someone because I was possessed, my family was kidnapped, and I saw my wife die in front of me. And then-
Balthier: It really never ends.
Cain: My son hated me for a while, my daughter got kidnapped by her psychotic boyfriend, and then she was put into a coma by a vampire, and to finish I was killed by a vampire.
All: *turn to look at me* Shame on you.
I’m sorry! *hides*
Sariel: I feel kind of out of place now. My life wasn’t so bad.
Cain: I beg to differ. First off, kidnapped by Charles, and then left to raise a child on your own, and when you find someone you like you get controlled by the vampire who killed me and he impregnates you.
Sariel: Well it’s still not as bad as everyone else.
Balthier: It’s worse than mine dear. I probably had it the easiest.
Rosahelminthe: Yeah, no mine was the easiest.
Balthier: But I lived at least four times longer than you did.
See your lives weren’t so bad…
Zyla: *sits with a sigh* My story finally calmed down.
Cain: Ah Zyla’s was pretty bad, how did it go finally?
Zyla: Oh you mean, after I nearly died?
Millie: You nearly died?
Rosahelminthe: That’s nothing. I actually died.
Zyla: Well if you guys really want to know…
Balthier: So far everybody has said everything that’s been bad about their lives, so feel free.
Zyla: Okay, well, my mom was in a coma for most of my childhood-
Sariel: I’m really sorry about that Zyla.
Cain: It’s not your fault Sariel.
All: *looks at me*
But what? No, it was Blams and the pregnancy, it was Blams and the pregnancy!
Zyla: Anyway, my big sister was kidnapped when I was still a kid, I drank my own grandfather’s blood-
Cain: It’s nothing, she didn’t drink a lot.
Zyla: If dad hadn’t stopped me I would’ve. I got sort of kidnapped I guess, to the vampire mansion where they told me I was a vampire princess.
Millie: A princess, how nice!
Zyla: Yeah but then I got caught in this whole circle of madness that I could barely keep up with. My brother turned on me and tried to kill me. Blams tried to kill me. William kidnapped me once. And there was all this big hoohah about a huge powerful weapon that turned out to be a person and….I’m just happy it’s all done with.
All: *expresses sympathy*
Okay, yeah sure I gave you guys sucky lives (it was all to make it interesting), but you gotta admit there were some nice moments. I gave you beautiful love lives and all.
Millie: Yeah, I’d do it all again to keep Roland with me.
Sariel: Everything Rex and I went through has helped strengthen our relationship.
Balthier: Angel is someone I’d do anything with, every moment with her was precious.
Zyla: I love Simon, I really do, and I hope we can stay together for a long time.
Rosahelminthe: In the beginning Tarnowak was wonderful.
Cain: You killed my soulmate.
WAY TO RUIN IT CAIN.
Cain: But, when she was alive…there wasn’t anyone else like her.
There, those nice feelings you’re all feeling now, I gave you those.
So what? You only give me credit for the bad things?
Balthier: What you did was put obstacles in our way.
Cain: We are the ones who went over them and lived our happy moments.
Sariel: Just be nicer to the next generation okay?
Zyla: Yes! Please be nice and don’t kidnap all my children!
I do have the tendency to do that these days don’t I?
Zyla: It’d be nice to have a little more control over our destinies sometimes.
I’ll take that into consideration. Now woosh, you gotta go make the next generation!
My heirs all fit around a campfire…Oh wow now I’m feeling old and nostalgic…
It took me one year to write 6 generations. I think that’s pretty good.